I Write Songs I Eventually Dread Sometimes

When one produces a certain work of art, it usually comes from something - a thought or an idea, feeling and emotions, an inspiration. Writing songs is no different. Despite the truth about every songwriter being different from the other, it will always be universal that every song is conceived by something that is already there.

 

Fast forward to days, months, years or even decades when the subject of the written art is not anymore what it was, where it was before or what you want, the song of your very own making can cause you that certain feeling that is anything but positive. It becomes all the more difficult when the theme revolves around that particular something that is euphoric, ecstatic, happy... when currently, you are on the opposite pole.

It will always be a reminder of what was. It will always bring you to the place you no longer are stepping onto right now. It will always cause you to long for the air you were used to take in at the moment you've penned the song. It will never fail to make you feel feelings.

It is different when somebody else wrote it. Theme songs, yes, like sad movies, can make you cry. But you won't have an idea of what it can bring you unless you've made it yourself. When it originated from inside you. When the melody reflected where your mind went and how fast your heart was beating. When your words said what you mean. When you took the time to give life to something that is your own, and immortalize the time and space you were living for at the moment. Indeed, change is constant. And it is harder when you have put a cement on something you know will eventually be altered and be, nothing.

True enough, I write songs which I eventually dread sometimes. And I can't help but still listen.

Auditions Tomorrow: A Monologue

My live audition for Elements 2013: National Singing-Songwriting Camp will be tomorrow. September 17 at 2:00. A Tuesday.

I guess it's not really much of a big thing if I told others about it. Auditioning is not something new. But to think that the application was nationwide, involving a demographic of 18-35 year old singer-songwriters who may or may not be professionals, being one of the 150 shortlisted applicants who are given the chance to perform their song in front of Ryan Cayabyab is a big a deal to me. But I have never really thought about how it means to me until this jittery, butterflies-in-my-stomach feeling had began its operations inside my system.

See: http://elementsmusiccamp.com.ph/index.php/news/shortlist2013/

An audition. Me. Singing a song that I, myself, have written and gave melody to. A thing entirely my own: my thoughts and feelings. My personal experience. Something that I would usually contain within the confines of my encrypted journals and at times, share to a few select friends. Finally, for a certain - and rare - point in my life, I'm fighting for something that is my own. I'm shedding some of my wallflower skin for a while.

I took the chance to become part of Elements not to gain fame. For one, I'm not really comfortable being under the limelight. I consider myself to be this individual whose main function is to produce something, an idea or whatever art form, for others to give life to. 

I want to be in this camp because I want to be with people who share with me the same love and passion for the arts. In reality, growth in this particular aspect could be very difficult. We may be too caught up with our day-to-day responsibilities, demands of our careers, personal issues, etc, leaving us with no more time to really look within ourselves, our passions and what really makes us happy. Sharing even the shortest moment with individuals whose spirit are as hungry as mine, will help me enliven my dormant flame inside. With potential learning which will be imparted by those who are already way up there in this, self-discovery may even be possible. Wherever I may be after this, the flame will stick with me and make me a better person. 

Also, something in me thirsts for that opportunity to feed my God-given talents, because I know my beliefs, stories, ideas and thoughts in general may inspire even just a single soul, and I need the necessary means to be able to do that. Making a difference in this world may be a big work to accomplish, but if we know where to start, who to connect with, coupled with the technical know-hows, the enormous challenge in adding value to various lives may be within reach. Elements is the perfect venue.

Who knows? My song may gain its way to being in the list of Zia Quizon's next album.

But yeah, I should make good tomorrow. I knocked, and the opportunity opened its doors. The ball is with me now. Let's do this.

My ticket to the shortlist! (and hopefully to Elements 2013 itself):

A Wanderlust Post: Siem Reap, Cambodia (Part 1)

Probably the last set of stamps my first-ever passport would get.
Update (June 5, 2013): Wrong. Passport got extended, and I had about 2 more sets from Brunei and Indonesia!

"What is there to see in Cambodia?"

In a span of eight months planning for my ultimate travel in 2012, I have been asked this question so many times. 

"Angkor Wat. This is where you see Angkor Wat. You know, this massive ancient temple where Tomb Raider was shot. and Indiana Jones."

That seemed to satisfy them.

Now I realized, the answer I was used to mindlessly shot back at people's queries was an understatement of how an amazing historical artifact Angkor Wat is, and of that distinct charm Siem Reap has.

This is a lengthy answer, friends, but this is how I would answer you now if ever you'd want to ask me again.

INTROBLABBERS

We arrived in Siem Reap at 9:45 PM (Cambodia is an hour later than the PH), and the humble Siem Reap International Airport greeted us with its truly Cambodian building architecture. It wasn't too busy that night, basing from the number of people in line for immigration. I guess only the passengers from the same Cebu Pacific flight I was in were there at that time. (Also, we figured that Jay Taruc of the QTV's Motorcycle Diaries was also with us on the flight, probably going to feature Siem Reap or its neighboring cities).

The facade of Siem Reap International Airport's Arrival Area.
Yeah, blurry. And dark. Literally.

Incidentally, our Cambodia getaway was in time with the
ASEAN Ministers' Meeting in Phnom Penh (4 hours away from SR).

On our way out, we were greeted by a WHOLE LOT of tuktuk drivers who were from the accommodations the passengers reserved, with signboards bearing our names. I observed that most of them came from the same hostel we booked, Bou Savy Guesthouse. And there was my name, "EAMARIE" in its full glory, being handled by a relatively young tuktuk driver who had a really big grin on his face. "I'm so lucky my passengers came out first" said Ney, who will eventually be our assistant-slash-driver-slash-waiter-slash-roomboy-slash-friend in the whole of our stay in Siem Reap. Aww I miss Ney (in a non-malicious way).

Oh hey, it's Ney!

They got my name right! And it's in Cambodia!
Also, please don't mind my hair.

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

It was dark at night. I thought maybe the airport was located in the outskirts, that's why. But later I realized Siem Reap is not yet THAT urbanized. But in contrast to that description, there was a plethora of hotels, hostels, inns, guesthouses lined up in the streets, almost all having "Angkor" in their names. Restaurants offering buffets along with a show featuring the Cambodian dance "Apsara" were also in multitudes. 

Just one of them "Anchors" you'll get to see. This is beer, btw.

And another one. 

A conclusion in my mind had been formed upon realizing these. Cambodia lives by tourism. What I appreciated more is the fact that while on one hand, there's competition amongst them in the tourism business, it is amazing that almost all the businesses are linked to each other - tuktuk agencies link up with hotels, which have networks with travel operators, who are connected to restaurants, so on and so forth. I dunno, but I felt a sense of 'bayanihan' in that more than competition. (I'm not really a business strategist, but hey, don't you think this could work in PH as well?)

So true.

BOU SAVY GUEST HOUSE

If you try to search for most recommended hostels in Cambodia, it is without a doubt that you'd get to stumble with Bou Savy Guesthouse, it being one of the top ranked accommodations in the whole of Siem Reap. Cleanliness, good service, strong Wi-Fi connection; name it, Bou Savy has it. What tops the list is that this guest house has an INCREDIBLY CHEAP RATE. Believe it or not, I and Jam only paid $ 18.50 (around Php 780) each for a 2 night, 1 day stay at a twin aircon room in Bou Savy. This is already inclusive of a whole day tuktuk ride to Angkor Wat and other temples, and 2 bottles of water.

Not only was it cheap, booking service via email is soooo easy.

And if you think it stopped there, you're wrong. Because there was an available room which was bigger (for three people), the owners decided to let us stay in this room instead for the same rate! This, plus free breakfast and other perks. 

To any of you guys who plans to go to Siem Reap, I highly recommend Bou Savy Guest House for a comfortable, satisfying and memorable stay. (Click here for reviews)

Banana-Pineapple Shake, our Welcome Drink. Yum!

Isn't our room nice? You can see satisfaction in Jam's expression.

Our mini-TV which was mainly for the purpose of watching FTV. 

Free breakfast! In chopsticks.

Cutesy bananas! Haha

KHMER PEOPLE

Of all the Southeast Asian people I've come across with in my travels, Cambodian people are the most charming. They always have these bright smiles everywhere you go. Their way of talking is comparable to Ilonggos in the Philippines, it being sweet like music to the ears. I'll always have a perpetual imagination of these people blurting out, "Hey laaaaydeeh, tuktuk? masaaahge?" and it never fails to remind me of their character. They were always kind and accommodating especially to tourists, and never get mad when you ask for a discount in shops. Their sense of trust was also admirable; when you are in a business establishment, everything is post-paid. This means that when you stay at hotels, or eat at a buffet-type restaurant, payment is always collected afterwards. It is easy to sneak out given the many customers and unsuspecting staff, if you want to. But this is like a standard. But well, it is too difficult to do something inappropriate if you've been given this big a trust.

One of the most touching things: As we were about to board a
bus to Bangkok, a staff from Bou Savy ran after us to hand this cute souvenir. :)

Well, that's it for the first of the third part of this whole Siem Reap, Cambodia experience. Stay tuned for more on the Angkor Wat and other noteworthy places to go to in Siem Reap in my next blog entries! :)

Tanduay Rhum Rockfest Year 6

More than VIP.

Consider myself lucky, I have got one of these from a friend who's got high-level contacts at Tanduay.

I can't wait to see Up Dharma Down, Parokya ni Edgar and Chicosci (Mong, oh Mong my perslab)!

So friggin' excited!

My Beautiful Pair of Ugly Hands

Sometimes when I look at my hands, I see this not-so-pretty, not-so-feminine, imperfect pair of moving anatomical carpals which I always have hated, aesthetically. They're kind of larger than that of a normal lady's, chunky, with chapped skin at the fingertips caused by my guitar's strings. But whenever I have these hypothetical thoughts of trading my hands with somebody else who's got a prettier pair than mine, I'll put a sudden halt to all these stupid, childish and unintelligent thoughts and recall think of the amazing things only I can do, because of my ugly pair of hands.

My ugly pair of hands has this power of capturing the speedy flow of my thinking, especially when I get caught up on a certain moment when my brain just wouldn't stop giving out ideas. One of the things I love about my person is this capability of putting into words an otherwise unintelligible concept. And with the help of my hands, the seemingly impossible become real. Concrete. Immortal.

The chapped morsel of skin in my set of left fingers may not be pretty; but they were caused by a magical activity which can produce a chord. A chord which when played together with the others becomes a beautiful melody. A melody when heard can capture not only one's ears, but also one's heart. My ugly pair of hands is capable of touching somebody's heart.

My ugly pair of hands has worked wonders in making other people happy, too. A tap on a successful somebody's shoulder, a tight grasp of a sad person's hand, an embrace intertwining a beloved... These significant people wouldn't have had a lift in their spirits, were it not for my ugly pair of hands.

They have also set beginnings for me. They were able to shake itself with another hand, symbolizing new relations.

Although they are also made for sadness - a wave goodbye or for an angry clenched fist - I know that my pair of hands can be beautiful. They're my beautiful ugly pair of hands.

Same goes for my life. And your life too.

A Wanderlust Post: Phuket, Thailand 2011

I guess it was love at first sight. Going back to the way I felt back then, there was this mix of excitement, awe, happiness, and probably all positive adjectives you can think of, as our plane was on its way to landing on one of my dream destinations, Phuket, Thailand.

A sparkly view from the top.

I first heard of this place as a child - a grand prize for a game show or something I couldn't remember. Then there was that James Bond movie shot in Pha Nga Bay, then Leonardo DiCaprio's 'The Beach' which was equally majestic. With all these ideas in my mind as a younger, not-yet-earning kid, one thing was certain in my perspective - Phuket will remain a dream forever.

But baby, there I was, on the 4th of August 2011, standing in Phuket soil and ready to rumble.

But of course, prior that, we have also experienced this pauper-like stage.
Particularly Bebe Wilson :P

THE CREW: PHUKET 'PEEPS'

Ready, set, smile!
One of the few pictures we were actually complete.

Travel experiences are more fun when you've got your crew, which in this case was proven by the exceptional time I had with my college classmates / friends / travel buddies Erwin, Karla, Sisa, Apple and Wilson. It couldn't have been more adventurous as this travel was a spontaneous one. No plans, no IT, none. All we had in mind was we were going on a Phi Phi cruise, party, shop, bum around in the nearby beach. Other than that and details in between, nada.

MR. PETER, THE BIG BUDDHA AND MARINA THE BABY ELEPHANT

In this state of plan-lessness it was a good thing people in Patong province, Phuket were helpful. We met our resident driver, Mr. Peter (no surname in his calling card, which has got a drawing of a cow or something, we don't have any idea why) on our way to our breakfast early morning of August 6. For ThB 800, he was our chauffeur for the whole day, inclusive of all our chosen places to visit, and funny chats about how he loved Pacquiao. From there he suggested we eat at PhongPhang resto, which served seafood straight from the beach on location.

That's Mr. Peter and Apple (aka Pacquiao's daughter. hahahaha)

PhongPhang resto view

Yummiest Seafood Pad Thai, evar.

It was already in the afternoon that we decided to go to the Elephant trekking site in Karon. But as we were on our way there, a marvelous view has left us awestruck. There was the Karon beach, with its polvoron-like white sands and torquoise blue waters on a bright sunny morning. Karla, the Brazilian goddess from Australia told us that it resembled Bondi Beach, only less crowded. 

Okay so this is a jump shot fail. But you get the point.

Jump, Erwin, Jump!

It wasn't actually the first time I saw an elephant in flesh, but it had been my closest encounter yet. Marina was the cutest of them all. With one command from her trainer, she'd happily pose for the camera, smiling, doing that upward maneuver of her trunk and crossing of her leg. It was no doubt the most adorable thing in the world. It was actually then that I finally decided that Elephants would be my favorite (jungle) animal. 

Marina striking a pose with the girls!

The trekking elephant

For a discounted price (courtesy of Mr Peter) of ThB 1300, we've been entitled to a trek onboard the larger elephants, and a ticket to the elephant show. Unfortunately, we didn't have anymore budget for that. We contented ourselves with the banana feeding of our furry friends, which left us guilty having Mr. Peter haggle the price for us (up to now I feel that way, don't you guys?).

Banana feeding the elephants. Go Bebe Wilson!

After which, we drove en route Big Buddha, which according to Mr. Peter is the largest Buddha shrine in the whole of the Earth. 

Lesson learned: Do not wear shorts when going to Buddhist shrines.
Or else, they give you these cloths to cover yourself with.

A smaller (golden) version of the Buddha

The Big Buddha in flesh! Or in concrete!

BANGLA ROAD, THE NIGHTLIFE OF PHUKET

The day will not be complete without the inevitable 'unwinding' to cap the night up. Bangla road in Patong is pretty much famous for its night shenanigans. Prostitution is legal in Thailand, and thus the whole of the Bangla strip is made especially for this activity. 

Passing Bangla 's girlie bars

Dancing ladyboy (?) bunny

Besides that, street food was awesome. It was a little bit pricey compared to Bangkok, but it was all worth it. This place probably has the best-tasting street food in all of Thailand (made that up).

the ThB 50 Banana Pancakes

Money-saving tip: These are better for dinner than resto food

Because they had their own night out on the last day. :))

PHI PHI ISLAND CRUISE

The cruise was the highlight of the entire tour. We already have booked the tour the night before, courtesy of Erwin's family friend Ate Maan. The whole cruise, inclusive of transpo to and fro Silver Resortel (our hostel), and buffet lunch at PP Princess Hotel, amounted to ThB 1,300. There we were able to enjoy the view while riding the mini cruise ship which passed by Krabi and Maya Bay (The Beach, yes!), swim and snorkel at Monkey Island and take pictures. We also had a very satisfying lunch.

All aboard

Maya Bay (The Beach)

Port

Backpackers represent!

Our mini cruise ship. Karla's there by the way, obviously, well, never mind.

Lunch at PP Princess

Of course, all good things must come to an end, and by 7th of August, we were all set to get back to reality and reminisce this one of a kind experience in Phuket, the ultimate travel of 2011.

Farewell!

Finally, a good jump shot.

Till the next wanderlust adventure! :)